Tuesday, June 17, 2014

10 Things I Have Learned In 10 Years Of Marriage

June 19, 2004. A day I will always treasure. The best day of my life. That is the day I married the best man I have ever known. The day I married my best friend. The day I became a Mrs. 

No matter how long I have been married he always makes me smile. It was a hot, sunny day. I woke up early to go and get my hair and make up done by my very good friend "Ms. H." We met at the church and that is where I became a princess. 

I walked the aisle of that country church at 4pm. I looked into his eyes at the end of the aisle and knew that so much love was waiting for me at the other end. I saw his eyes and knew that I was in good hands. His eyes said it all...he didn't even have to speak. 

As we said our vows and committed our lives to each other and to God I felt at peace. I felt so full of joy I could have burst. I felt so much love in that church. People had gathered. They gathered to witness two people commit to love, honor, and be faithful to one another. To put God first and each other next above all else. 

My love for this man has grown into something unexpected. Something I look forward to unwrapping each day like a brand new gift. He makes me feel loved, cared for, wanted. He makes me feel like a woman. 

Through the last 10 years I have learned a lot and we have gone through a lot. 10 years of marriage, 3 houses, 2 dogs, 2 cats, and 4 children. It has not been all joy and contentment. There have been struggles. Huge, heart-breaking, back-breaking struggles. But, we've gotten through them all because we have each other. We have God and we have each other. 

10 Things I Have Learned In 10 Years Of Marriage:

1. Laugh hard and laugh often. Laughter in marriage is very important. Especially when raising children. Laugh at yourself too. Don't take life too seriously. There are enough things in life that are serious. Laugh til you cry with your spouse.

2. Hold hands. You know this simple act is done very little anymore. Well, at least for me. The other day Hubby and I were walking around our yard looking at all of the flowers and trees and admiring their beauty. He suddenly took my hand in his and didn't let go for a long while. It made me feel like I belonged and that I wasn't alone in this world. I told him how it made me feel and we are making an effort to do this more often. Hold your man's hand. It will feel so wonderful. 

3. Let it go. Don't fight over the small stuff. Let things go and you will feel less stressed out. If you hold on to every little thing that your man does wrong, well, you are a prisoner and don't even know it. You are a prisoner of your controlling nature. Let it go and smile more. 

4. Flirt with your hubby. Before he gets home from work put on some perfume, put your hair up, and change out of those yoga pants. Greet him at the door with a kiss. Make him feel happy to come home and sad to leave. Send him sexy texts messages while he is at work or put a note in his lunch bag letting him know how much you love him. Flirting with your hubby is lots fun!

5. Do stuff together. If he likes to go hiking, go for a hike. If he likes playing basketball, go shoot some hoops with him. Believe me, he will want to do the stuff you like too. I like to go to the antique mall. I have noticed that if I do things he likes to do he actually suggests going to the antique mall. Have fun together and get out and do something. 

6. Be his best friend. My hubby recently called me his best buddy. I know that may sound silly to some women but I know my man and he meant it as the highest of compliments. We confide in each other, have each other's backs, tell secrets to each other, and do stuff together. He really is the best friend I have ever had. 

7. Go on dates. If you can get a sitter for the little ones go out for a meal and a movie or whatever you like to do. If you can't get a sitter, wait til the little ones are in bed and eat dessert together and snuggle on the couch. Either way, make time to be alone with your spouse.

8. Stop nagging. This seems pretty clear cut. If you find yourself nagging just take a breath and close your mouth. I have a very hard time doing this. I like to drive the nail in deeper and deeper. LOL! I have to remember to stop getting after him. He is his own person...I am not his Holy Spirit. 

9. Be intimate with your hubby. I know it can be difficult to make time for this and to be "in the mood" when you have time. But, it is so important to the marital relationship. God designed "it" for us. So, be intimate and enjoy it. 

10. Take time at least once a year (preferably on your anniversary) to reminisce about your wedding day. If you have photos look through them together. If you have a video watch it. We plan on doing the very thing. I love to look at the pictures and video. I always forget that something happened until I see it again. It is a lot of fun. 

I love being married. It has made me a better person and has filled my life with love, laughter, and joy. Marriage has also brought something else. Motherhood. Through my marriage to my husband we have three handsome little guys. I love them all so much it hurts. We also have our Baby Kendall in heaven...waiting for us. 

Just look at those rascals. They couldn't be cuter. These boys were born from love and into love. Our hearts are so full with them in our lives. 

Well, I pray you all will have a wonderful weekend. I am going to be celebrating my anniversary on Thursday night at our favorite steak house (I got a coupon for BOGO free!!). My in-laws so graciously said they would watch all three of the boys overnight so we will go to a late movie after dinner. Friday we want to wake up late...past 6am. LOL! Who knows what the day will bring but I am thrilled to spend it with the man of my dreams! Until next time...



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